Kill The Boy Band » Book Review

I've never been one to lose my head over hormones.  But there was this one time that I went to a big, parking lot bash at my university, and a boy band was playing that night.  I went to the event with a girl I knew from my dorm and she dragged us straight to the barrier in front of the stage. This went against every introverted, corner-loving instinct I had.  But something weird happened, being pressed up against that barrier... The opener came out and played, the crowd behind us grew, my hard lemonade kicked in, and by the time the boy band came out, I was ready.  I went coo-coo-crazy.  I remember staring up at the lead guitarist and just lusting.  If that guitarist had looked out into the crowd and made eye contact with me, he surely would have reared back and toppled off of the speaker he was jamming on top of, because I'm pretty sure in place of pupils and irises, I had two spinning Loony Tunes vortexes in my head. It was crazy. I was crazy.

It was my first taste of what it's like to be a rabid fangirl.

Reading Kill the Boy Band brought me back to that moment I had, squished up against shrieking college girls at the concert, all of our eyelines and vocal chords united.  I had this feeling then that I was capable of more than usual.  And not in an enlightened sense.  More like I was suddenly able to reach down into my inner animal and go on a rampage like that bear from The Revenant.

Kill the Boy Band is about four girls on such a rampage.  Erin, Isabel, Apple, and "Sloane" are super-fans of the famed British boy band, The Ruperts.  They have some insider knowledge of where the band will be staying the night of their Thanksgiving concert special, so the girls book a room at the same hotel.  Nothing will get between them and their chance to meet the boys. Nothing will get between them and the boys. Nothing between them and the boys.  Nothing between them...Nothing...

What happens when 250+ pounds of fangirl puts 'nothing' between herself and a boy bander at top speed? This must have been one of the many real questions that inspired Moldavsky when she drew up this novel.

In fact, most of this crazy satire deals with practical questions about what, in fact, fangirls are capable of when they are given opportunity and a hotel key-card.  What array of crimes could they stack up? How low would their needy, grasping hands go? And are death-plots beyond the stretch of the imagination?

The delivery isn't always perfect in Kill the Boy Band, but the concept is A-plus. I give it 3.5 stars and recommend.