An Enchantment of Ravens » Book Review

 

An Enchantment of Ravens » Sierra's Thoughts

I must have been a faerie in my past life because this book made me feel nothing. It's a pity because it has such an interesting premise and I really thought I would enjoy it. Another reviewer compared the setting and atmosphere of the novel to Uprooted, which is one of my absolute favorite books of all time, so I was pumped.

While I do agree with that assessment, it wasn't enough to save the book for me.

WARNING: I may sound like a Love-Grinch, here...

In order to like this book, you have to be rooting for Isobel and Rook's love story. But... WHAT LOVE STORY?! How did it even happen?! Somehow, the process of them falling in love completely slipped by me.

When I started the book, I thought Isobel was a great character. She was not only an extremely talented artist but also a clever young woman...

Now, in the book, human crafts are traded for faerie enchantments. However, you have to be very careful about how you word these enchantments because the faeries enjoy tricking humans and finding ways to subvert those enchantments. Our heroine, Isobel, always thought these enchantments through and made sure that they benefited her whole family — her Aunt Emma and random goat-sisters. She was smart.

Alas, all good things come to an end because she meets a prince and feelings happen.



"This wasn't like me. So many years of being cautious, and in a matter of minutes I'd started slipping up."

DAMN YOU, ISOBEL. I refuse to believe that years of dedicated attention to detail can fall by the wayside as soon as she gets a crush. Shouldn't some kind of cognitive muscle-memory kick in?

Here's a quote where Isobel does some self-reflection on this matter:

"Now I have to tell you how foolish I am. Before that gray and lifeless time following Rook's departure, I'd always scoffed at stories in which maidens pine for their absent suitors, boys they've hardly known a week and have no business falling for. Didn't they realize their lives were worth more than the dubious affection of one silly young man? That there were things to do in a world that didn't revolve solely around their heartbreak? Then it happens to you and you understand you aren't any different from those girls after all. Oh, they still seem just as absurd - you've simply joined them, in quite a humbling way."



Here's the thing. I can actually buy into this. Ellen can tell you, I pine like no other. However, unlike the readers of this story, Ellen knows every searing detail behind the pining. (She may not want to, but she does.)

In An Enchantment of Ravens, we have no idea why the pining is happening. Isobel meets Rook; Rook saves Isobel; Isobel starts slipping up; Rook sits for portrait; Rook is vain, Rook pays Isobel in enchanted ravens; (*BAM*) Isobel is in love with Rook. And all this happens within the first four chapters...

As I read on, though, I realized that there is a redeeming quality in Isobel. She does eventually realize that infatuation is different from love and is able to discern that within herself.

But by that point, I had lost my investment in the characters. In the book, we never really figure out why or how Isobel and Rook fall in love. And because their love is the driving force behind the plot and action of the book, I wasn't very invested in those things, either.

Plot, Pacing, and the Rest

The plot of this book is predictable. If you are familiar with its genre, you will see the plot twists coming a mile away. Nothing surprised me. As for the pacing, it was a little all over the place, but it didn't detract from the overall story.

The main issue I had with this novel, is the way the author seemed to hide pieces of information from the reader for no apparent reason. Have you ever had a friend, in your childhood, who would start to give you something and then just snatch it away at the last second? That's what it felt like. (I'm not friends with that person anymore.)

For example, Isobel references the trauma of her parents' death a few times, even in a discussion with her aunt (who was also shaken up by what had happened), but nobody — not the author, not Isobel, not the aunt — ever goes into any details about what occurred. It was infuriating!

To Close...

Even though An Enchantment of Ravens is supposed to be a stand-alone novel, it could be expanded into a series. Maybe that's where we'll learn what happened to Isobel's parents. I don't think I will pick up a sequel. However, I do think I will give this author another try if she publishes an unrelated novel.

The Hundred Lies of Lizzie Lovett » Book Review

I have NOT been having a good reading week. The Hundred Lies of Lizzie Lovett by Chelsea Sedoti continues my streak of 2-star reviews. This book showed up on my radar during my weekly perusal of Netgalley books. The cover made it look like a fun contemporary and the synopsis promised me an interesting mystery.

This book is also featured in Publishers Lunch's Buzz Books 2016: YA Fall/Winter. Ellen and I had a chance to read and review 2o samplers, including The Hundred Lies of Lizzie Lovett (full review HERE). I wasn't impressed back then, and I definitely am not now.

Hawthorne

Hawthorne, named for the tree and not the writer, is an insufferable teenager. That's not part of the blurb but it very well should be. She is is self-centered, whiny, narcissistic (yes, I know this is the same as self-centered but it's so bad that it needs to be mentioned twice), and irritating.

The first two lines sums it up for me.

"The first thing that happened was Lizzie Lovett disappeared, and everyone was all, "How can someone like Lizzie be missing?" and I was like, "Who cares?" A few days later, there was talk about Lizzie maybe being dead, and it was still kinda boring, but not totally boring, because I'd never known a dead person before."

Is anybody else reading this in a valley girl accent? IT CAN'T BE JUST ME GUYS.

As you can see, the writing is incredibly juvenile. Ellen would have had a fit. But being the nice and open-minded reviewer that I am, I put that aside. I tried to settle into the mind of this obnoxious 17 yr-old girl.

Compassion & Kindness

I absolutely despise people who have no compassion for others. In fact when I was 11, I almost punched a girl because she made a comment about how this earthquake in Punjab should have killed people. And the fact that it hadn't meant the earthquake had 'no pride or dignity'. Whatever that means. My two best friends had to drag me away when they saw the thunderous look in my eye.

Looking back I realize that we were children. At the time I had already gone through life experiences that had taught me the value of human life. And I couldn't bear that someone else was taking it so lightly and uttered such despicable words. I'm not in touch with this girl anymore, but I'm sure she's grown into a kind and compassionate person. After all, she didn't know any better at the time.

Hawthorne has no real compassion for anyone else. And I HATE her for it. I didn't expect her to be moping around, but good god, try to have SOME caring thoughts for Lizzie and the people who are suffering due to her disappearance. Hawthorne is so damn DISRESPECTFUL. If I were her best friend (Emma? Emily?), I would have slapped Hawthorne.

Plot

This isn't a plot-driven novel. In fact, there is barely any plot in it. Since the synopsis mentions Hawthorne inserting herself into the investigation, I thought there would be more, you know, REAL investigating. Instead we just have Hawthorne taking on Lizzie's old job at the diner and gallivanting around with Lizzie's boyfriend.

She does have a theory about Lizzie's disappearance though. But it is just the fucking WORST. I don't want to mention it for fear of spoiling people, so thank god for spoiler tags!

[spoiler]Hawthorne thinks that Lizzie turned into a werewolf. Obviously, I read a ton of supernatural fiction so the concept of were-wolves existing doesn't bother me the slightest. But someone is actually missing. Why the hell would you go around telling people that she's a werewolf? Especially to people who are actually concerned and grieving about her? With absolutely no goddamn proof? WTF is up with that?!??![/spoiler]

Hawthorne constantly says, Lizzie can't be missing. She's too perfect. Things like this don't happen to her. Hawthorne says that about everybody around her. Things are perfect for others. Nobody understands me and my struggles. While I can sympathize with some of those feelings especially when live in a world of social media where it is so easy to compare ourselves to the posts and instagram pictures of others, I CAN'T STAND HOW WHINY SHE SOUNDS ABOUT IT. Dear god Hawthorne. You're not the only one going through crap. OPEN YOUR EYES.

Since this is a character-driven story, we do see Hawthorne evolve and learn from her mistakes. So yes, she does eventually learn that she needs to be less self-involved, more compassionate and respectful but I can't forgive her for being such an ass in the first place.

Romance & Friendship

The romantic elements are the only parts of the book that I didn't mind. Besides the whole going out with a guy whose girlfriend just disappeared, it seemed realistic. There were some elements of her relationship with Enzo that I could personally relate to so that did tug at my heartstrings. The confusing nature of relationships and what it means to be physically and/or emotionally intimate was explored well.

I will try my best not to rant about Hawthorne's friendship with Emily, whose name I had to look up. The author depicts Hawthorne as so self-involved, that she BARELY mentions Emily (it's written in the first person perspective). Part of that had to do with the fact that their friendship went through some ups and downs throughout this book. I practically cheered when Emily detailed some of Hawthorne's character flaws. Honestly, Emily deserves a better friend. Like I mentioned before, Hawthorne does go through some personal growth as the novel ends. In fact, there is a scene where Hawthorne (FINALLY) asks Emily about her life instead of blabbing about her own personal theories. BUT WE DIDN'T GET TO READ ANY OF IT. *sigh* It's still all about Hawthorne. I guess people can't change all that much.

Final Thoughts

I gave this book a fair shot and it just wasn't for me. I have personal issues with people who aren't compassionate to others and take advantage of their friends. I've been Emily several times. GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN.

I gave The Hundred Lies of Lizzie Lovett 2 stars because it was still a quick read and there were a couple of elements that I appreciated. Also I started drinking sangria (pictured HERE) halfway through, so that definitely helped. I will ponder over this rating in the next few days and see if I'd like to lower it.

Happy reading everyone!

 

Scythe » Book Review

The Premise of Neil Shusterman's Scythe

[dropcap]Most[/dropcap] science fiction and dystopian writers out there agree — in the future, humanity will have either colonized space and left our beleaguered Earth behind, or we'll still be here, living in post-apocalyptic misery. Neil Shusterman, however, has come up with an alternative scenario in his latest book, Scythe. 

Shusterman imagines that our Earth is saved due to our many advancements in technology.  We've successfully stabilized our environment, eliminated war, and created an integrated, global community, all with the help of a benevolent AI, called the "Thunderhead." The author's biggest hook, however, is that humanity has cured death.

Obviously, such a massive medical innovation creates issues, population control being at the forefront. So because natural death is moot, people have now embraced unnatural death as an unpleasant necessity. 

In this futuristic utopia, monastic men and women called "Scythes" are now in charge of who lives and dies. Scythes are greatly respected, but live as outcasts. So when our two teenage narrators, Citra and Rowan, are tapped to become apprentices of the Scythe they both stood up to, they meet the news with disgust and trepidation.

They're given a choice, and they make it. They become the Scythe's students. To their infinite surprise, it isn't long before Citra and Rowan grow to love their teacher, the deeply honorable Scythe Faraday... but although Faraday tries to shield his pupils from the deviants within his profession, Citra and Rowan are soon entangled in the plot of a mass murderer and a political death game.

Shusterman Likes to Make Readers Question

[dropcap]Shusterman[/dropcap] has a easily digestible writing style, which makes his books pleasant and fun to read. He also bulks up his plots with themes, which often deal with the future, technology, and life and death. When a younger teen I look after told me that he was reading Shusterman's Unwind in his eighth grade English class, I wasn't totally surprised. Shusterman's books can appeal to that species known as "reluctant readers" and also eke out of them meaningful conversations about higher concepts.

I can see Scythe being a versatile book, like its predecessor Unwind. It will appeal to a wide range of readers and make them ponder certain questions. When we, as a civilization, advance, must we expect new issues to arise? Who should decide the answers to these ethical problems? And here's a doozy, my favorite question that Scythe presents to us — Is unnatural death always wrong?

All these ponderments and more wait for readers within the pages of Scythe. Even better, Shusterman doesn't have an obvious agenda at play in his book, but presents these questions with subtlety and suggestion.

Why Only Three Stars?

[dropcap]Most[/dropcap] of all speculative fiction requires some suspension of disbelief. It's part and parcel of the genre. This is especially true of fantasy books. For science fiction writers, however, it's a point of pride to get as close to scientific reality as possible.

In Scythe, there are a handful of moments where Shusterman half-heartedly tries to make his technology seem realistic, but fails. This only offended me mildly, however, compared with the book's many illogical events, inconsistencies, and impossibilities. The book's plot and premise were riddled with holes.

I found it peculiar, in a novel where Shusterman so clearly wants us to think about things, that we're expected to nod our heads and go along with these flaws of reason. It left a bad taste in my mouth.

Finally, I took issue with the total want of chemistry between our two main leads — Citra and Rowan. Their relationship, in whatever form, should have been the beating heart of the book. Instead, I'm disappointed to say that Shusterman phoned in his efforts on this front. An actual line from the book reads: "he was, in fact, attracted to her." 

Those familiar with writing craft have no doubt heard the adage, "show, don't tell." The idea is that merely telling the reader that a character feels something is far less emotionally resonant that demonstrating that feeling through descriptive suggestion.

This is why the line, "he was, in fact, attracted to her," baffles me utterly. It's so baldly unimaginative, and really is indicative of how human relationships are depicted within Scythe. For an author of Shusterman's experience and acclaim, I expected better.

The Bottom Line

[dropcap]I[/dropcap] was tempted to give Scythe a mere 2.5 stars, but ultimately decided upon three. For all of his faults, Shusterman knows how to write a well-paced and entertaining book that stimulates the mind with its thematic questions.

However, the plot holes within the story are impossible to overlook, and the cardboard emotions of Citra and Rowan do this book no favors.

Blog Tour » The Lost and the Found [Giveaway]

It's a pretty well-known fact that I have an eerie addiction to crime shows. Nightmares didn't stop me from binging all 9 available seasons (at the time) of Criminal Minds. Right now I'm watching Netflix's The Killing which stars Gillian Anderson and Jamie Dornan. . Perhaps I'm a bit disturbed, because I've been fighting of a bizarre attraction to Jamie Dornan (our serial killer) ever since.

Anywho, my point is that I love my crime shows. But I always wonder what happens afterwards. For a girl who has been gone 10 years, what is it like to reintegrate into her family? I've read Jaycee Lee Dugard's memoirs on the subject, but my fascination remains. The premise of The Lost and the Found was unique to me, because I had never read a fictional account of this situation before.

The Good

As you guys may have noticed, Ellen and I have been AWOL recently. In my case, it's been because I've started classes and I participate in a ton of volunteer work. I'm always busy and barely have enough time to read. That's why The Lost and the Found was such a great read for me. I could barely set it down, so every spare minute I had was devoted to this book.

Faith, our main protagonist, was a wonderful character. She was equal parts caring and devoted, but also frustrated and selfish. Her relationships with her family, friends, and boyfriend was real and nuanced. I loved her relationship with her stepfather. He was kind and understanding, and there for Faith in a way her parents could never be.

The author also spent a great deal of time dealing with the media coverage of the situation and the frenzy that arises after a kidnapee like Laurel is found. She mentions the journalists, the tv interviews, the book deals, and the strain that Faith and Laurel's parents have gone through in terms of curating their image to the public all in hopes of finding their lost daughter.

The relationship between Laurel and Faith was interesting to read about. Especially how it slowly grew from being strangers to sisters. That is sisters who fight and can get jealous but also laugh together and combine forces against their parents. It's the definition of true sisterhood after all.

There's also a brief moment when a character in the book discusses how popular Laurel Logan's case was in comparison to that of lower-class or non-white kidnap cases. It's not something I've really thought about too much, but it did affect how I've been thinking of this situation. The argument presented was, was it fair for the police and media to devote this much attention to Laurel Logan when nothing even close to that was devoted to other missing children that were non-white and/or lower-class. It's definitely a tricky situation to address, but I appreciate that the argument was presented so that we can assess it for ourselves.

Not As Good

While I did enjoy the book, I only gave it 3 stars. While I was riveted by the story, I pretty much guessed exactly how it would go. I wasn't truly surprised by anything and I must say that I'm a little disappointed with where it ended up. It's almost like the book dealt with more issues than it could realistically handle. By straddling two main storylines, neither of them could be fully developed or expressed.

While I understand Faith's decision at the end of the book, I disagree with it. [spoiler]She should have told her parents about Laurel's death.[/spoiler]

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Cat Clarke

Cat was born in Zambia and brought up in Edinburgh and Yorkshire, which has given her an accent that tends to confuse people.
Cat has written non-fiction books about exciting things like cowboys, sharks and pirates, and now writes YA novels. She lives in Edinburgh with a couple of cats, Jem and Scout, who spend their days plotting to spit up furballs at the most inconvenient times. She likes cheese A LOT, especially baked camembert.

Links: Website || Twitter

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Follow the Tour!

Week 1

9/12: Such a Novel Idea - Review
9/13: The Story Sanctuary - Q&A
9/14: Avid Reader - Review
9/15: Who RU Blog - Novel Secrets
9/16: Novel Ink - Review

Week 2

9/19: Here's the Happy Endings - Guest Post
9/20: Blue Books and Butterflies - Review
9/21: Take Me Away to a Great Read - Mood Board
9/22: Quest Reviews - Review
9/23: Curling Up with a Good Book - Top 10

I Hunt Killers » Book Review

Apologies for our mini-hiatus! I have been engrossed by various murder-mystery shows on Netflix and Hulu and we all know what a long drawn-out rabbit hole that can be. Naturally, that led me to desire a book called I Hunt Killers, which I discovered through My Guilty Obsession. See Ali's review HERE.

I Hunt Killers

This novel has a fairly unique premise. The child of a serial killer? What sort of crazy, fucked-up shit will we get to see?! Ahem, did I sound too excited there? Oops.

It's supposed to allow us an inside perspective on the mind of an organized serial killer, and how they see the world. As a dedicated viewer of Criminal Minds (though Thomas Gibson, WHY ARE YOU SUCH AN ANGRY FOOL), I've developed a bizarre obsession with serial murders. However, I assure my dedicated readers out there, I have never contacted one or willingly spoken to one. I haven't reached that level of insanity yet.

Jazz Dent

Jasper, or Jazz as he is known to his friends (though this immediately brought to mind, TLC's show about a transgender teen 'I am Jazz'), is the son of the most prolific serial killer America has ever seen. Even though Jazz was raised to follow in Billy's footsteps, Jazz has managed to live a relatively normal life. Kill-free.

It is no secret that I tend to loathe contemporary novels that primarily features a teen male's point-of-view. But I really liked Jazz. While I couldn't relate to him (and hopefully none of you can), I truly felt for him.

When a teen is involved in solving a crime, a certain suspension of belief is typically required. I didn't feel that way at all. The entire story was plausible, provided that the reader accepted the premise.

Everyone Else

Howie is Jazz's hemophiliac best friend. I enjoyed their banter and appreciated their strong bond. That being said, Howie's perspective would have driven me nuts, so I was glad to see him in the best-friend role. Connie is Jazz's girlfriend. I liked how their relationship was portrayed because it was (finally!) a realistic teen relationship. You know, as realistic of a relationship with a serial killer's son can be.

Since this is set in the sleepy town of Lobo's Nod, we also get to know many other characters including Jazz's crazy grandmother, the sheriff that caught Billy Dent, and many more. All of that added to the ambience of the serial crime spree. I shan't touch on the mysterious murders too much because I think it's best to not know too much about it.

I enjoyed how the story progressed and how the overall story arc for the trilogy was developed. I raced to the library to pick up the next book, Game, immediately. I can't wait to read more!

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Do you have a favorite serial-killer mystery book to recommend to me? Let me know in the comments below!

Romances With Musical Elements » Mini-Reviews #3

I've been on a romance novel kick! I get into these grooves sometimes, where I just want to read about people falling in love. It's heartwarming! However, romance novels can also be low-quality books at times. You really have to go digging for love stories that fit your preference. So I got out my shovel and went excavating. In this post, I'll be sharing my thoughts about four romance novels that all share something in common... I found them all on a Goodreads Listopia about ROCKSTARS.

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[book-info number="1"]

It's hard to believe that I've gone this long without reading this romance staple, let alone any Abbi Glines. For some reason, I thought I wouldn't like Fallen Too Far! It turns out, I was right! I didn't.

Let me discuss the good stuff first. In the beginning, I really enjoyed the main character, Blaire. She's very sympathetic, coming off years of caring for her terminally ill mother. Paying for cancer treatments cleaned Blaire out, so upon her mother's death, the young woman reaches out to the father who had abandoned her. It's that, or become homeless. But Blaire's dad is out of the country with his new wife. So instead, Blaire must accept the help of Rush, her wealthy stepbrother.

I found it both compelling and inspirational how Blaire both reaches out for help AND works her tail end off to become independent. Her work ethic was completely admirable. I think I could have read a whole book about nothing but Blaire working and becoming stabilized financially. Unfortunately, that's not the way the book went.

Fallen Too Far is ultimately a romance novel, and I didn't like the love interest whatsoever. Rush had no personality. He was a shell made out of abdominal muscles. His top activities were throwing house parties, following Blaire to her work at the country club, and acting like an erratic asshole. I hated him.

The more Blaire fell in love with that douche-lord, the more I disliked her as well. By the time the end of Fallen Too Far came around, I was sick of both of them. Suffice it to say that I won't be revisiting Rosemary Beach in the future.

Music Levels: None

Fallen Too Far is included on some booklists for having a musical element, but it was negligible. Rush's money comes from his dad, who was a drummer in a famous rock band. That's all. No one actually makes music or listens to music in this book. The most "rockstar" thing that happens is that Rush puts on eyeliner to go to a honky tonk bar...

[book-info number="2"]

In the Band was a decent romance novel, but it suffered from a sub-par love interest as well. Our romantic hero is literally named Romeo, but he was far from love-god status.

Our heroine, Riley, was top-shelf, however. I loved how she was an amazing drummer. I was brimming full of girl-power pride, reading about how Riley tore up people's stereotypes and expectations, and blew everyone away with her amazing musical talent and dedication. Also impressive was her love for her little sister. Riley gives up quite a lot, personally, to give her sister a better childhood, and it made her into character who I rooted for utterly. (However, by the end of the book, it did seem like Riley gave up too much.)

Romeo, however, didn't seem to get the memo that Riley is a superior life form. He spends the majority of the book being a huge jerk to her. The reason behind his foul behavior is ultimately lame. It couldn't be more obvious that their enemies-to-lovers story was a poorly thought out construction by the author. At the beginning, the device worked. I was hugely invested in flipping the pages to find out what the dude's beef was. The ultimate reasoning wound up being unsatisfactory, however. Maybe, for me, there couldn't be any decent reason behind Romeo's asshole-ery.

Overall, I liked In the Band, but it had some definite issues.

Music Levels: Medium

In the Band doesn't go into technicals at all, but it gets major points for having tons of scenes where the musicians are at practice, or playing gigs. So often, romances featuring music don't have true musical detail at all. Jean Haus, our author, was a step above here, putting effort into making Riley's passion and hard work believable.

[book-info number= "3"]

The Duet started off fairly strong, but fizzled out for me somewhere in the middle. In this book, a pop princess is assigned by her record label to write a duet with a darker singer-songwriter and preform it with him at the Grammy's. Upon meeting, Brooklyn and Jason immediately loathe each other, despite their mutual physical attraction. Despite it all, they decide to spend a month at Jason's Montana ranch, composing the song.

The more I look back at The Duet, the more I dislike where the plot went. The ranch house should have been a smaller aspect of the book. Instead, it took over the story. The book felt at many points like one of those modern Western romances, where the rich girl is sent to a cattle farm and meets a cowboy, etc. etc. etc. It was like the author was just grabbing at whatever romance tropes she could find and sticking them together with dollar store craft glue.

Music Levels: Low

This is my main beef with The Duet. Despite the female and male lead BOTH being successful musicians, you'd hardly know it because we get almost no detail about their careers apart from aspects of their fame. When it came to music composition, the characters' sparse writing sessions were laughable. I'm no musician at all, but even I could tell that the "technicals" were unrealistic in the extreme. The only musical term that Grey uses is "chords." Also "G-string," but you might guess how that was incorporated into the tale. And why the hell would it take two musicians a month in seclusion to write a song? Just wacky.

[book-info number= "4"]

The Mighty Storm had a great romantic premise and started off strong. Trudy, our main character, is a music journalist based in London. She comes from a musical background, with her dad, an ex-rocker, nourishing her childhood with lots of love and plenty of rock history. Also a recipient of that love and those music lessons was Jake, the neighbor kid, who was Trudy's best friend throughout their childhood and early teens. However, at 14, Jake had to move abroad with his family and lost touch with Trudy. But years ago, Jake rose to stratospheric fame with his band, The Mighty Storm. When the book opens, Trudy is assigned to interview Jake, throwing the two ex-friends together for the first time in twelve years.

Obviously the two are going to reconnect and fall in love! Duh! Our job as readers isn't to wonder if, just to wonder, how. Let me tell you, though, that how was pretty rocky. There were lots of theatrics and plenty of drama. Sometimes it got tiring, I have to admit. Neither Trudy nor Jake were incredibly mature. But damn, if one aspect of their ups and downs didn't get to me... [spoiler]It was Jake's drug use. At one point, a chapter ends with the couple happy and incandescently in love. The next chapter begins with, "He's using again." I know that this book is a somewhat silly romance novel, but reading about how drug use just demolished happiness and functionality hit me hard. [/spoiler] I surprised myself by getting legitimately torn up over that part of the book.

Overall, I don't know if I can recommend The Mighty Storm. I enjoyed it a lot... when I wasn't rolling my eyes hard. I know that the book had big issues, but I made a personal decision to ignore them and get swept up in the ride.

Music Levels: Low

Unfortunately, Trudy's love of music, which comes out strongly in the beginning of the book, wanes when she gets swept up in her romance. That was a shame. It would have been amazing if the author had incorporated more legit jam talk into the story. As for the band dynamic in The Mighty Storm, we don't get any music talk from or about them, either. It was a bit of a bummer. Like The Duet, the musician angle seems to be more about fame and fortune than about actual, you know, music.

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Out of these four books, In the Band had the best depiction of actual musicians who play actual instruments. However, I liked what The Mighty Storm was trying to achieve — an epic love saga. The Duet and Fallen Too Far were both flops for me, although they each had some redeeming elements.

All in all, reading these books was great fun, but none of the writing stood out as really skillful. I'll have to keep digging. ;P

My Lady Jane » Book Review

My Lady Jane was a strongly hyped book written by three well-known YA authors. I believe it was also an Owlcrate book for the month of May. I was feeling a little apprehensive going into the book because while I was familiar with all three authors, I couldn't say that I particularly adored their previous works.

Cynthia Hand is the author of the Unearthly trilogy, Brodi Ashton is the author of the Everneath trilogy, and Jodie Meadows is the author of the Newsoul trilogy and The Orphan Queen series. I've read the first book of both the Unearthly and Everneath trilogies, but the love triangle didn't inspire me to continue. I read a brief sample of the first Newsoul book and chose to stop there.

Thankfully, My Lady Jane didn't suffer any of those issues.

Tudor England

For most of us, the historical setting will be very familiar. Who wasn't fascinated by King Henry the VIII's various marriages and break from the Catholic Pope? It was one of the few times my class perked up during our history lessons. Even though our focus is on Lady Jane (made obvious by the title), we are initially introduced to Edward. From then on, our perspectives switch between Jane and Edward.

Edward is a teen boy who doesn't focus too much on his kingdom. All of his work is done through his privy council and his advisors, including Lord Dudley. He enjoys the company of his half-sisters, Elizabeth and Mary, and his cousin, Jane. Even though Edward wonders what it would be like to marry Jane, he is convinced by his advisors to marry her off to a Gifford Dudley, and to allow Jane's male heirs to be Edward's successors should he not be able to provide his own heir.

Most of that seems to be historically accurate as far as I can surmise from my AP History class and brief research. Now comes the interesting part...

Magic?

In this version of history, magic exists. More precisely, shapeshifters exist. Naturally there are two factions. Those who are shapeshifters and those who are not. They do have precise terminology within the novel itself. But it has been a little while since I've read the book and I've already returned it to the library so I can't recall them offhand.

We learn that Edward's father could turn into a raging lion if he was displeased. Edward and Jane spent much of their time as children wishing and practicing to be a shapeshifter themselves. The addition of these fantastical elements does allow a historical fiction book to appeal to a wider range of readers. It also allowed certain tweaks to be made to our version of history.

Romance

I did mention that Edward had considered what it would be like to marry Jane. However, there is NO love triangle in this book which I was deeply appreciative of. Instead, we get to see the romance between Jane and her new husband Gifford develop. This is actually one of my favorite tropes in historical romance novels. For whatever reason, I do love to see a marriage of convenience or a marriage of hatred to turn into a marriage of true love and affection.

This romantic story did not disappoint. I adored Jane as a character. She was intelligent and smart, focused and driven. I enjoyed her sense of humor and nothing fazed her for too long. Her interactions with Gifford were sweet and I was really rooting for both of them throughout the novel.

We also get to see romances develop with other key characters as well, but I'm feeling a little too lazy at the moment to expound upon that further.

My Rating & Why

I did really like this book. Even though it is close to 500 pages, I could read it relatively quickly. My only complaint is that it felt too juvenile. I would say that it fell closer to the middle-grade end of the spectrum rather than the mature YA that I was expecting.

The romance is VERY PG. The plot is quite simple even for someone unfamiliar with the historical time period. While I enjoyed the sense of humor from the characters as well as the omniscient narrator, it didn't set the book apart for me in any way.

The Guest Room » Book Review

The Premise of The Guest Room

[dropcap]In[/dropcap] The Guest Room, Richard is a married investment banker and father to a nine year-old daughter. He decides to host his younger brother's bachelor party in his own suburban home. He and his wife strongly suspect that the groom and his friends will hire "female entertainment." The couple shake their heads over it, but figure it will all be harmless.

After Richard's wife and daughter leave to spend the night at Grandma's house, the party guests arrive and so do two strippers. Accompanied by stern bodyguards, the girls seem unusually willing to push boundaries. Soon, the raucous party is descending into a bacchanalia... and then an orgy.

But then, everything turns on a dime. The girls turn murderous, killing their bodyguards before peeling off into the night. In the days following the bloodbath, the police confirm the nasty truth... the girls were sex slaves, captives of a human trafficking operation.

Soon, Richard's entire life is spiraling out of control. His marriage and job are on the rocks, and so is his mind. Moreover, his thoughts keep returning to the guest room, where he looked into the eyes of the girl called Alexandra. Who is she? How did she fall through the cracks of the world and wind up the prisoner of brutal and merciless captors? And most urgently — where is she now, and what has become of her?

The Guest Room... It's About Misogyny and Rape Culture

[dropcap]Truly,[/dropcap] The Guest Room was no tour de force, but it was, at times, forceful. For one thing, Bohjalian comes down hard on sex slavery, as one would hope. Oddly, though, I didn't find his terrible and graphic depictions of rape and degradation to be the most powerful part of the book, although they most certainly shook me to my core. Something struck me even harder, and that was the author's characterizations of everyday misogyny and male entitlement.

Bohjalian was extremely purposeful, I think, in crafting certain characters that represent modern-day, American rape culture as we know it. In The Guest Room, the character Philip and his buddies represent living, breathing, fraternity rape jokes. They're the guys who palm a girl's ass in a crowded concert venue and yell in her ear, "You're the prettiest girl here!" They're the bros who DIY freshman orientation banners reading, "SHE'S CALLED YOU DADDY FOR 18 YEARS, NOW IT'S OUR TURN!!!" They're the fellas who craft public statements on behalf of their rapist sons, writing that six months in prison is a "steep price to pay for 20 minutes of action." All put together, these boys and men create one giant, leering eyeball, one clammy, groping hand, one lecherous, catcalling voice, and make up the body that is rape culture.

Bohjalian did nice work in showing us such characters who promote a culture of rape without being overt and intentional rapists themselves. According to Bohjalian, those men can be our husbands, brothers, fathers, and sons. We know them. They live normal, law-abiding lives, and yet they contribute to a social disease because they do not truly empathize with women. I stand up and applaud this angle of The Guest Room. It needs to be said. It needs to be understood.

What Bohjalian did not do was present us with any insightful characterization of rapists or traffickers. He had ample opportunity to do so. In The Guest Room, there were many men and women responsible for holding Alexandra and other girls captive, torturing them and arranging for them to be repeatedly, limitlessly violated, brutalized, and raped. Perhaps Bohjalian didn't want to get into the mindset of people capable of that kind of evil. Maybe he flat-out couldn't. I know that if I tried, I could not mentally tap into that deepest malevolence. I imagine that it would be very, very difficult to create a character with that kind of nature. For whatever reason, Bohjalian did not go there.

The Bottom Line

[dropcap]If[/dropcap] Bohjalian had done it, if he'd written comprehensible portrayals of a full spectrum of misogynist behavior — from everyday soft sexism to full-on trafficking and exploitation — then I think The Guest Room could have made it to the next level. As it stands, however, Bohjalian only managed to nail down part of that spectrum.

Because of that, The Guest Room is a decent, mid-tier suspense novel that engages the compelling issues of misogyny, rape culture, and human exploitation. The book gets big points for its moments of brilliance. But I craved broader, more ambitious characterizations, all to culminate in an even greater thematic punch.

[rating stars="three-half-stars"]

With Malice & You Know Me Well » Mini-Reviews #2

Meh?

With Malice is supposed to be a suspenseful, psychological thriller. Ellen already wrote up an excellent review a little while ago (HERE). I didn't have much to add, so I thought a mini-review would work out best.

At its core, With Malice is a story of 2 girls and their love for each other, and how important of a part the media can play in determining the innocence or guilt of an individual. Jill is a quiet, bookish girl who is focused on her studies while Simone is an outgoing personality who is more focused on having a good time than thinking about college. The other major difference is their families. Jill's parents are divorced but well-off while Simone's parents are religious and still married, but struggle with their finances. Despite these differences, Simone's and Jill's friendship thrives from the time they were little.

Since this had been marketed as a thriller, I was expecting a lot more out of this novel. For one, I didn't realize that most of the book would be Jill recovering from the car accident in the hospital/rehab. We get bits and pieces from her memories as she slowly recovers them. It is interspersed with interviews, transcripts and any other evidence collected by the Italian authorities. It was interesting enough, but it lacked actual action.

Perhaps it is as Ellen said in her review. I'm too old for teen angst and drama. I suppose more importantly, I'm too old to invest and believe in teen angst and drama. Nothing came as a surprise to me.

I rated it 3 stars because I didn't have very high expectations. It was a quick and easy read. After having written this review, I am considering lowering my rating to 2 or 2.5 stars. But I will let my original rating stand for now.

I am glad that I chose to borrow it from my library, however. I don't foresee ever re-reading this one.

[rating stars="three-stars"]

[book-info number="1"]

This was unexpected. It's the only way I can describe my reaction to reading this book. Ellen (as always) has written up a wonderful and more coherent review (HERE).

You Know Me Well is not a work of genius by any means. If I had picked this book up at any other time, I would have given it the requisite two to three stars and moved on. I still decided on the three stars because while I could relate to the book, I didn't feel the magical spark for the entire novel, just for very specific bits and pieces of it.

Kate & Mark

I can see why a lot of people wouldn't enjoy Kate's character. However, I could relate to her. The running away, the questioning of friends and relationships. I'm in a similar position myself, so I could sympathize with the alienation she was feeling with her friends. I could Understand.

And Mark just broke my fucking heart. I'm sure many of you out there have gone through the process of unrequited love. It's awful. It's always there nagging at you in the back of your mind and you just wish you could STOP. It appears at the most inconvenient times. It pops up as a painful reminder just when you wonder if you're finally getting over it all. As you might be able to tell, I'm in the midst of that process myself.

Mark's sadness made me relive my own sadness. It was cathartic, and much needed.

It's time for me to go wallow in ice cream guys...

Poppy & The Movie Version » Mini-Reviews #1

Mini-Review

I almost feel like a TERRIBLE person for just giving this book 2 stars. This is what Ellen would call an 'issue' book. In this case, we tackle how mental illness can affect not just the individual suffering from it, but also the other family members. In The Movie Version, our focus is on Amelia.

Amelia is a typical teen girl with an older brother, Toby, and two younger twin brothers. She and Toby are incredibly close and throughout the book, we get to see instances from the past that really bonded the two together. I am a huge sucker for strong sibling relationships, and I chuckled with nostalgia at their 'Secret Sibling Society'.

Unfortunately, the pacing of the book wasn't for me. Essentially we are experiencing a year in Amelia's life but I couldn't connect to her very much. I liked the portrayal of her family (especially with the twins, making sure they are two separate characters instead of one) and even though I would occasionally get frustrated with Amelia and her friendships, I understood what she was going through. This book also featured the most realistic romantic and sexual relationship in any YA novel I have ever read. I LIKED so many aspects of this novel, but it wasn't a gripping read.

Just a warning, as the title suggests, Amelia is a movie buff. So there are a TON of quotes and movie references thrown about. That did jar me at first because I didn't always get the references, but I managed to keep going without letting it bother me.

It felt too 'meh' for me.

[rating stars="two-stars"]

---

[book-info number="1"]

Mini-Review

I read Poppy a little while ago, and can't seem to remember too much about it (not a good sign). It's marketed as young adult but I think it would be more appropriate for middle-grade readers.

I liked Poppy as a character. She is hard-working and cares deeply for her family. When she gets the opportunity to assist the war effort as a VAD (essentially a volunteer nurse), she jumps at the chance and pours her heart and soul into the work. I really liked the historical elements of the novel. We get to see everyone's initial attitude toward the war and the slow shift that takes place as injured and dead soldiers flood back to England. This is also the beginning of women's independence as they shift from the private sphere to the public sphere in order to aid the war effort and to replace jobs that were previously occupied by men.

The romance in this novel is laughable at best. It is very insta-lovey. I have no idea how it happened. Though as I recall, it all began from a glance. A glance like no other.

IS THIS THE GLANCE THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT???

Cause let's be real. I only look at chocolate cake that way. I'm clearly not cut out for human love.

I think this would be a decent historical fiction book for early middle-schoolers. If I knew that from the beginning, I might have been a little more generous with my rating. But because it was marketed to me as a young adult historical fiction novel, I expected a lot more.

---

I'm finally getting caught up with my reviews, guys! *does a little happy dance*

The Kardashian Memoir vs. The Kardashian Exposé

[dropcap]They've[/dropcap] been called harbingers of doom and ushers for the fall of Western civilization. I'm talking, of course, about the Kardashian/Jenner clan, the family that's dominated entertainment headlines for almost a decade now. It's easy to think that, at this point, these family members have exposed themselves completely, but it's become more and more apparent that their open image is really a carefully curated facade.

I've been watching Keeping Up With the Kardashians (KUWTK) and its subsequent spin-off shows ever since they first aired.  My interest in the show ebbs and flows, but I can say that I'm pretty well-versed in Kardashian lore. However, there have always been details that niggled at me.  Is this family really as tight-knit as they profess to be? Despite their policy of overshare, do they have any secrets? How do they truly perceive themselves?

This past week in the summer of 2016, right off the tail of Kim Kardashian's Snapchat exposure of Taylor Swift, I decided to do some digging. Why not? On my reading list was the 2011 memoir of Kris Jenner, Kris Jenner... And All Things Kardashian, and also the recently-released exposé, Kardashian Dynasty, by Ian Halperin. These books, two versions of the same story, were going to go head-to-head.

An Overview of Kris Jenner's Memoir

[dropcap]I[/dropcap] was expecting this memoir to be a bit of a hate-read for me, because above all other Kardashians and Jenners, Kris Jenner repels and baffles me the most. Mothers like Kris seem to be getting more air-time lately on reality television, but when KUWTK first debuted, I found Kris Jenner to be freshly shocking and twisted.

For one thing, Kris is intent upon how much she values family (her main claim to virtue), but common-core "family values" are most definitely not part of her maternal agenda. In the first season of KUWTK, Kris made viewers' eyes pop with her gleeful negotiation of a nude Playboy photoshoot on behalf of her daughter, Kim. As Kim's manager, Kris got a 10% cut from the deal. On camera, Kim's sister, Khloé, called their mom's involvement "sick," and I and other watchers grimly agreed with the assessment. Kris is a very different kind of mother, as she showed time and time again.

But on the opposite foot, Kris comes across as extremely devoted to fulfilling her vision of happiness and success for her children. I have to concede some ground at that point. There's something truly compelling about a woman whose singular goal is family greatness. It's Cersei Lannister level stuff. So I wondered, would Kris's story, in her own words, change my mind about the woman in any way? As it turns out, yes and no.

From a young age, Kris made steps towards fame and fortune by connecting herself with loaded, older men. First was a PGA golfer, when she was still a teenager. Then she cheated on said golfer with Robert Kardashian of the wealthy Kardashian family, who she later married at twenty-two. After she'd produced four children with Kardashian, she was discovered in a serious infidelity, which ended her marriage.

Now, I found Kris's description of her self-proclaimed lowest point, when Kardashian cut off all financial support, to be highly fascinating and very enlightening. Kris was accustomed to living lavishly and shopping a tear, but she had zero knowledge of the family's finances. Kardashian, she insists, controlled everything and volunteered nothing about the state of their accounts. So when her husband cut the pursestrings and cancelled her credit cards, Kris was broke. At one point, she recounts taking her children out for pizza and then realizing that she couldn't pay. She had to borrow sums from family and friends to get by. Kris says those moments were turning points in her life and influence her driving need for financial independence to this day.

When she married Bruce Jenner shortly after separating with Kardashian, the new couple had to start from the ground up. Underground up, even. Bruce had $200 in his bank account and $300,000 in debt from his failed business endeavors. What a turnaround from her gold-digging days! But Kris was a new woman. Quickly, she appointed herself Bruce's manager and wound up being very, very successful at that job. After booking Bruce tons of speaking gigs and endorsements, the couple started raking in cash. They bought a home in luxurious Calabasas, California, and popped out two more kids.

Tragedy struck when Nicole Brown Simpson, wife of O.J. Simpson (best friend of Robert Kardashian), was brutally murdered. A huge chunk of Kris's memoir is dedicated to her friendship with the Simpsons, the murder, and the investigation and trial. Kris writes that she was "extraordinarily close" with Nicole, but had no inkling that the domestic abuse was occurring within the marriage... no knowledge until it was all too late. Only after the murder did all the clues start coming together to spell O.J. as a fiend.

Jumping forward, Kris's explanation of how her daughters, especially Kim, rose to fame is fairly discordant with public record. For instance, she makes no mention of the sex tape which is regarded as the catapult that launched her daughter into notoriety. Instead, Kris credits her own negotiation of a reality show with E! as the impetus which launched the Kardashian empire.

What the Exposé Revealed

[dropcap]For[/dropcap] a while, Ian Halperin's Kardashian Dynasty just seemed like a rehash of everything Kris had dished in her memoirs, with only small callouts. For instance, Halperin challenges the veracity of Kris's story of holding hot pots of coffee over lecherous men's crotches during her brief stint as an airline stewardess. "In those days, however, sexual harassment was part of the job and she wouldn’t have lasted long had she employed this tactic. But it makes for an empowering anecdote," he writes. Jesus Christ. You call that an exposé? 

But things got juicy eventually. To my relief, Halperin majorly calls Kris out for insisting that she had no idea that Nicole Brown Simpson was being abused prior to the murder. It had struck me, while reading Kris's memoir, that it was weird for her to have been so oblivious to the pain and suffering of so a close friend. But it felt bully-ish to think like that. Maybe Nicole was just very secretive. Maybe Kris was just very... clueless. But then Halperin pointed out that pictures of Nicole, severely battered, had been published in newspapers before the murder. There was no way that Kris was unaware of O.J.'s abusive habits. Much more likely is that Kris was dazzled by O.J.'s fame, charm, and influence, like many of his acquaintances were, and she gave him a pass. Sad and horrible, but likely.

Another red flag... Kris states in her memoir that she ultimately reached an agreement with Robert Kardashian where she received nothing in the divorce proceedings. "I entered this marriage with nothing, and I left with nothing," she writes. She insisted that she called her elite divorce attorney and told him she changed her mind and wanted zip. But Halperin points out that this was false. She actually received $5,000 a month following the divorce. Damn, Kris. Why not just say so?

And about that sex tape that Kris mentions zero times in her memoir? Halperin went undercover as a porn peddler to find out the truth. All he discovered, really, was that it's highly likely that both Kim and her partner, Ray J, approved the release of the video prior to its release by the porn distributer, Vivid Films, and negotiated a deal where they'd each take a cut of the profits. Halperin argues that the Vivid's policy is to not release, for legal reasons, a tape where each partner had not signed off. Publicly, Kim sued Vivid, but they reached an out-of-court settlement with five million dollars being awarded to Kim. Also agreed upon in the settlement — the sex tape was to be taken off the market in 2007. Halperin checked though, and the tape is still up for sale on Vivid's website, now, in 2016. I didn't bother to fact check that one, but it seems a glaring breach of agreement for the meticulous Kris Jenner to pass over.

Also highly interesting to me, is how the Kardashians are obsessive about making the people around them sign nondisclosure agreements. Apparently Kris keeps a stack of the blank contracts on a foyer table in her home, along with a little framed poem about keeping your mouth shut. "WHAT WE SAY HERE, WHAT WE SEE HERE, LET IT STAY HERE, WHEN WE LEAVE HERE." Halperin ran up against several nondisclosure blocks when researching for his exposé, encountering quite a few employees of the Kardashian's and Jenner's who claimed they'd get their ass sued off for more money than they'd make in a lifetime if their lips wagged.

I thought this was particularly fascinating because KUWTK is a show based upon over-sharing. There is serious, gross-out TMI on that show. So what have they got to be shy about? I get that the family doesn't want people blabbing all the time about them, that makes sense, but the intensity of their off-camera secrecy intrigues me. What could the Kardashians and Jenners possibly want to hide from us?

One such skeleton that Halperin mentions is the much-touted theory that Khloé is not Robert Kardashian's bio-daughter at all, but the result of another affair of Kris's. Duh. But Halperin runs down the wrong rabbit hole! He believes that Khloé is O.J. Simpson's daughter, when everyone knows it was Kris's hairdresser, Alex Roldan, that Kris screwed around with, resulting in Khloé. The resemblance is striking, even with Khloé having done a lot of work to her face. On top of that, a while back it was reported that Kris made Roldan sign... a nondisclosure agreement! According to the agreement, if Roldan speaks to the press concerning the Kardashian/Jenner family, he has to pay Kris a staggering thirty million dollars.

With all earnestness though, I know that genetics are so random and Khloé's differences in appearance from her twin-like, Armenian-esque sisters might mean jack diddly. And true parentage has nothing to do with biology and everything to do with who loves and cares for a child. Robert Kardashian is, by all rights, Khloé's dad.

So What Did I Discover?

[dropcap]I[/dropcap] had three questions about the Kardashians/Jenners when I started reading these books.

Despite their policy of overshare, do they have any secrets? 

The answer is yes. Through writing her memoir, Kris actually shined a spotlight on many of her secrets once Halperin came along to call her on things. Apparently, she doesn't want people to know she received alimony from Robert Kardashian, though who knows why not. She'd prefer it if we thought she was a good friend to Nicole Brown Simpson. I do get that one. The idea that she failed in helping her friend escape an abusive marriage, which ended in that friend's murder, doesn't look wonderful. And there are also possibilities that Kris had more lovers than her one, admitted extramarital affair. Oh yeah, and Kim may have sold her own sex tape for millions of dollars and notoriety.

Is this family really as tight-knit as they profess to be?

This question wasn't really explored too much in the exposé. But according to Kris, the family sticks together through thick and thin, no matter what. However, Kris does not speak with or see her only sister, Karen Houghton. They've been estranged for a few years now, sometime after Kris wrote in her 2011 memoir, "Karen and I are part of each other's lives to this day." Make of that what you will. And there's been lots of in-fighting among the Kardashian siblings of late, particularly between the daughters and Rob. For several seasons, Rob was borderline estranged from Kim, Kris, and then even Khloe. They seem to slowly be mending ties, but who can forget Rob's social media post where he shared an image of the bloodstained, psychopathic narcissist, Amy Dunne, writing the caption, "This is my sister, Kim, the bitch from Gone Girl."

How do they truly perceive themselves?

And this. This is a mystery that will never be solved. In the beginning of her memoir, Kris compares the allure of her family to Mona Lisa's enigmatic smile. People just want to know all about us! But no. I don't want to know how many ounces of breast milk Kourtney expressed on Tuesday morning or when Khloé and Lamar's unisex fragrance, Unbreakable, will be in stock in stores.

I just want to know...  what they are thinking?

A Promise of Fire » Book Review

Ellen and I were both DYING to get our hands on an ARC copy of A Promise of Fire when we saw the slew of 4-5 star reviews from reputable bloggers. Unfortunately, we didn't feel the same kind of magic that they did. Ellen disliked it (to put it mildly) and she already wrote up a review (HERE) detailing her less-than-stellar opinion of the book.

Fortunately for me, I didn't despise it quite as much as she did. But I definitely agree with all the issues that Ellen brought up in her review.

Catalia

Our main character, Cat (as she likes to be called), is 23 years old. I didn't figure that out until I started writing this review! She talks like a petulant 15 year old. During her inner monologue, she frequently uses words like 'gah' and 'gag'. If I was playing a drinking game, I would be drunk in 3 chapters flat. Okay, okay. I'm a lightweight. BUT STILL.

"Thanks the Gods. Gag!
Sort of.
Except not at all.
Gah! I'm going insane!"

SHOOT ME.

The synopsis calls Cat smart-mouthed.

I wouldn't say that the words coming out of her mouth are... 'smart'. It's mostly a constant stream of 'I hate you', 'get lost' and 'let me go'. Look, I love a witty character. I LIVE for banter and sexual tension. She talks for the sake of saying words and to antagonize others. I should pull out quotes, but gaaahhhhh I don't wanna! (See what I did there?)

One of my bookish pet peeves is when a character claims that she is secretive and guarded and yet can't seem to keep her mouth shut and spills her secrets anyway. This happened NUMEROUS times. For example, even when she clearly makes everyone around her promise to keep her secrets from Griffin's family, SHE IS THE FIRST ONE TO BLAB IT OUT. It took about 10 minutes into dinner for that to happen.

Uh huh. Guarded. Secretive. I see it. Of course the BIG secret needed to be kept because how else can we stretch it into a trilogy?

My other pet peeve is when self-sacrifice is taken to the extreme (*cough* Supernatural *cough*). Cat is supposed to be a strong, badass woman with amazing powers. And sure she makes use of some of them, BUT TO THE POINT OF DEATH. This happened not once, not twice, but a total of THREE times. She gets completely conked out and needs Griffin to take care of her. That seems to be the feminist response to the damsel in distress trope. We can't have the female be completely incompetent... so let's make her snarky and powerful, but still need a man to save her from the aftermath of it to keep the romance alive!

Why a 3 Star Rating?

For all my griping, I did enjoy the read. It was frustrating at times, and cringe-worthy at times, but I kept going and I was always interested to see what was going to happen next. Even though Kato & Flynn (the other members of Griffin's personal team) were practically identical characters, I ADORED the brother/sister relationship they had with Cat.

Even though I found the romance problematic and Griffin a little too high-handed, I was still invested. Until a certain plot detail cropped up. Then I totally lost it. [spoiler]Magical sexual healing??? WTF! Poseidon sent Cat a magical jizz man to heal her?![/spoiler] I managed to get through it though. Thank god for Ellen.

Even though I firmly believe that this book didn't have to be stretched into a trilogy, I am still willing to give the next 2 books a shot. Hopefully it gets better from here.

A Promise of Fire releases today. Happy reading everyone!

A Study in Charlotte » Book Review

I was prepared to have A Study in Charlotte occupy my literal and figurative favorites shelf. After all, I'm an absolute nut when it comes to anything Sherlock Holmes. But sadly, this book just didn't do it for me.

Charlotte & Jamie

Charlotte Holmes is the descendant of Sherlock Holmes. Though is anybody out there (besides me) astonished at the fact that Sherlock managed to spawn children? I'd just as well believe that he somehow cloned himself rather than go through the icky ordeal of procreation.

Jamie Watson is the descendant of Dr. John Watson. Seeing as how John was a bit of a ladies' man, this part is more believable. Jamie is sent to a boarding school in Connecticut after acquiring a rugby scholarship. And lo and behold, that's where Charlotte happens to be!

Mycroft Holmes: Oh, Sherlock, what do we say about coincidence?
Sherlock Holmes: The universe is rarely so lazy.
- BBC's Sherlock "The Sign of Three"

Jamie has a strong fascination with his counterpart, Charlotte. He also hopes to be a writer like his ancestor, and wishes for a bond with Charlotte like his predecessor had with Sherlock. He finds out that Charlotte has been solving crimes for Scotland Yard since the age of 10 and has been well-trained in deductive and reasoning skills.

Fascinating, right? But I found it all SO dull. To me, this was essentially a retelling. Even with the change of setting, the contemporary time period (both of which had already been done before), the Holmes and Watson families, and changing Holmes to a female character, nothing felt fresh. Everything was recycled from the original Sherlock Holmes stories. Even down to the existence of the Moriarty family.

Friendship & Romance

My friend's little sister is named Jamie. So when I skimmed through the synopsis, I thought ooh, female friendship! Alas I realized that not to be the case. I always worry when either of the main characters are female. In fact that was the very reason why I refused to watch Elementary. I did not want a romantic dynamic to come into play at all. Luckily romance between Watson and Holmes did not come into play in Elementary (at least as far as I've watched). I sadly cannot say the same for A Study in Charlotte.

Luckily romance didn't play a central role in the story. But I found myself SO BORED. Honestly, I have very high standards when it comes to Sherlock Holmes. I need it to be clever. BBC's Sherlock did a wonderful job in modernizing Holmes and Watson, by creating strong yet likeable characters with a bond everyone can't help but root for, and updating the stories to fit the contemporary time period. And let's face it, Season 3 was basically fan fiction come to life *fans self*.

Last Thoughts

NOTHING surprised me in this book. The mystery should have intrigued me, but I just didn't care. I should have been cheering on the friendship that develops between Watson and Holmes but again, I couldn't care less. My favorite character was Milo, only because he was almost an exact replica of Mycroft (aka Mark Gatiss) from Sherlock.



I should have just re-watched Sherlock instead. I may give the next book in the trilogy a try when it releases next year. But I sure as hell won't be re-reading this one.

Imprudence » Book Review

Egads! Imprudence is the first physical book I have ever received from a publisher. Here's me gushing on Instagram and barely holding myself together.



My sister will attest to the fact that I was practically hyperventilating when I saw the package in our mail. I'M TOO POOR TO ORDER ANY BOOKS FROM AMAZON. When I saw that it was Imprudence, I almost fainted. But I didn't!

BECAUSE HOW ELSE WOULD I BE ABLE TO READ THIS BOOK.

Where They Are Now

After the events of Prudence (see review HERE), Rue makes her way back home where she receives a firm admonishment from Queen Victoria for her part in creating a separate treaty with the Varanas and the Shadow council. The Crown's legal protection has also been revoked from Rue as punishment.

That's not the only thing that's going wrong in London. I can't go into details, but I almost wept. One of the things I love about the way Gail Carriger writes her books, is that she keeps her focus on the world at large. Characters that we have loved through many series will continue to sneak in and out of the book, and we get to see how they have changed and evolved throughout the years.

In this installment, we watch Rue grow into an adult. Not just in terms of age, as she is officially 21 years old and has reached her majority, but also in maturity. She is finally confronted with some painful truths about her parents (all 3 of them) and starting to understand them as adults, not just as her guardians.

Rue & Crew

As always, I adore Rue and her crew members. Prim and Rue's friendship is as solid as ever, Spoo remains our delightful deckling (can't wait to see how she grows up), Percy our grumpy navigator, Quesnel our charming Frenchman, Aggie our curmudgeon, gorgeous Sekhmet, and Footnote! Every ship needs a cat after all. Sometimes even two.

My brief complaint about the book is that I never really grew to love Quesnel as I did Percy or Prim or Spoo. I really tried, especially since I knew that the romantic pairing would be between Rue and Quesnel. Their romance is definitely quite different than the traditional Victorian tale, and I adored the reactions of her parents. I must not have been won over by Quesnel. However, that didn't detract too much from my enjoyment of the story. The romance is definitely not the focus, and Rue handles it in a very mature manner.

Percy was SUCH an idiot in this book. I could have smacked him around for all the stupid decisions he made. I understood why he made those choices, but a smack was coming his way nonetheless. I love that Carriger can make me feel such strong emotions for her characters. I am also DYING to know what happens in Prim's future. For everyone who has read the book already, DON'T YOU SHIP IT?! Because I am the captain of that ship.

Colonialism

I found this to be a strong installment to The Custard Protocol series. Some of the issues I had in her previous book regarding colonialism was put to rest. As Rue travels and interacts with people that aren't British, we see her understanding of the world and the Empire's activities transform.

I almost want to go back and omit that section of my review in Prudence. But looking back with all the information that I have from Imprudence, it was clearly a process of growth for Rue. As a metanatural, she doesn't have normal citizenship rights and that has also impacted her view of supernaturals and their value to the Crown. She definitely isn't a mindless drone of the Empire. I think that was the greatest gift Queen Victoria could unknowingly give Rue as she removed the legal protection of the Crown.

Final Thoughts

I am DYING for a sequel. I originally assumed this to be a duology since no other books have been announced. Imprudence doesn't end on a cliffhanger by any means, but a few things have been set in motion and I'd love to see them come to fruition. Not to mention, I NEED TO KNOW HOW MY SHIP WILL SAIL.

The saddest moment for me in the whole book was when [spoiler]Rue was getting ready to leave London, and Conall had to give up being Alpha. We all knew this was coming, but I felt devastated for Conall as he lost his pack. When Rue showed her belly to Biffy in wolf form, and he rejected her, I felt her pain at losing her family. I'm just not ready (as a reader) to let the pack go either.[/spoiler]

According to Carriger, she hopes to publish a sequel in 2018. Only 2 years away!



I'm not crying!! There's just something in my eye...

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I'm excited to announce that I will be seeing Gail Carriger in person in Chicago next week! My sister and I will be going together and I am beyond thrilled to meet my favorite author of 2016.

The Butterfly Garden » Book Review

The Butterfly Garden was my first read for Booktubeathon 2016, and it made for a wonderful start! I started it at around 10pm and finished it a few hours later (around 1 am). So I have officially completed challenge #2, which is to read a book after sunset.

The Butterfly Garden

Trigger warning for rape and abuse.

I found this book to be an eerie and suspenseful read. I've always had a bizarre fascination with crime cases, especially those that involve long-term kidnapping and cults. Perhaps that would explain my dedication to Criminal Minds. This is a story about a girl, who identifies as Maya. She is a survivor of the horrors of the garden.

I'd highly recommend not going into this book with too much information or expectations. It's how I personally prefer to read thrillers, and it has served me well so far. But if you prefer to know a little more about this book, then keep on reading!

"Some people stay broken. Some pick up the pieces and put them back together with all the sharp edges showing."

The novel is told in two alternating perspectives. First we have the FBI agent (in third person POV), followed with Maya's perspective told in the first person. I really enjoyed that structure because it kept me guessing about Maya's motivations and her reliability as a narrator.

I LOVED this novel, as much as you can love a book that has such triggering and horrifying contents. I really connected with all the characters, and the story was moving. The pacing was excellent. I could not put this book down! I made my sister bring me dinner so I wouldn't have to go downstairs and take time away from reading. Yup, I'm that kind of big sister.

This was on its way to being a stellar 5-star book for me. Unfortunately, the ending was little... underwhelming. I expected more from this story and was left wanting. Nonetheless, I highly recommend this one for anyone looking for an engrossing thriller-esque read. You won't be disappointed!

This book is currently available for free via Kindle Unlimited.

July 20th, 2016
UPDATE: There will be a companion novel out next year, entitled Roses of May, and while it’s not a direct sequel, we will be following our Butterflies and FBI team for a time. The bulk of the story shifts to a new case, a new story, but some things don’t leave us so easily. Is it surprising if Butterflies have a way of lingering?

I'm so excited for the sequel! I will be grabbing it as soon as it releases.

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What are your favorite mystery/suspense/thriller books? Let me know! I'd love to check them out.

A Promise of Fire » Book Review

In every book review, I like to mix a little praise with a little criticism. I find that it keeps things intelligent and fair. But finding balance was a struggle with A Promise of Fire. Here's what I came up with...

This book was consistent... consistently bad.

This book broke rules... rules that should have been kept.

This book made me want things... things like my lighter.

That's the best I can do.

The sad thing is, I was really looking forward to A Promise of Fire. It's been getting raves from many reviewers! But did we read the same book?!

The Romance!

From the very first page, I had serious concerns about the quality of the writing. Seriously, from page one! Alarm bells were going off in my head like a chorus of rusty vuvuzelas. Turn back! Turn back! 

For one thing, the romantic cliches were thick on the ground right out of the gate. Our romantic hero catches our heroine's eye a few paragraphs into the book.  She's entranced by his roiling, rippling, and rolling muscles...

Spare me. The cheesiness didn't abate throughout the rest of the book either.  In fact, it just got even more distilled until I couldn't go a single page without screwing up my face. I've going to have to Oil of Olay the crap out of my forehead now. Thanks, A Promise of Fire. 

I didn't find the romance cute.  I didn't find it funny.  However, I didn't find it offensive, like one Goodreads reviewer did (although I understand why she thought so). What I thought about it was, Wow. This is really, really dumb. 

The warlord Griffin, or "Beta Sinta" kidnaps our heroine at the beginning of the book.  Now, this is a classic trope in romance novels, the abducted virgin, and I really don't have a problem with it.  It leads for some juicy situations that I'm not above enjoying. But Bouchet took the cliches too far, all the way to stupid town. Around the fifth iteration of our heroine squealing "I hate you!" simultaneous to her nipples hardening, I'd had enough.

There were so many laughable "romantic" moments in A Promise of Fire. I wish I could share them all with you so we could all snicker together and then go excuse ourselves to barf. But that would mean spoilers. And I don't want to ruin a very special scene for you guys. You deserve the magic of experiencing that moment fresh. You're welcome.

The Magic!

A Promise of Fire takes place in a fantasy world, but Bouchet inexplicably chose to transplant the ancient Greek religious system into her book.



Did you all know that I'm a die-hard fan of Greek mythology? So much so that I needed to do some intense deep breathing to get through Percy Jackson. It's even ironic that I put in this GIF from Hercules because I can't stand that movie. IT'S SO HERETICAL.

So, I was not amused or otherwise enchanted by Bouchet's inclusion of the Greek pantheon into her fantasy book.  It was weird, inaccurate, and came across as really lazy, to be frank. Why couldn't the author do her own world-building? Make up her own gods? It's not that hard. For instance, did you know that Hagon is the Luluan god of virgins, full moons, and bratwurst? Oh, you didn't? THAT'S BECAUSE I JUST MADE HIM UP! See? Not difficult.

The Craft!

This is perhaps the hardest part of the review to write, because I truly, truly loathed Bouchet's writing. I thought it should have stayed on Wattpad, or whatever Tartarus it was spawned within.

It was just horrible. The pacing, the dialogue, the transitions, the description, the characterization... literally every facet that makes up fiction writing... it was mediocre at best and dry-gagging bad at its worst.

I was thinking about pulling some quotes to give examples... but I wouldn't know where to begin or where to stop.

Everything sucked.

But perhaps the thing I hated most about A Promise of Fire was... the pacing. I know! It's a weird thing to hate. Usually when you think of pacing, you think of plot events happening either too fast, too slow, or just right. But Bouchet fucked up the pacing on an almost molecular level. Everything was too rapid, down to the level of a sentence!

And nowhere did the pacing seem more slapdash than in the dialogue sections. With each bit of speech, the characters would react in a dramatic way — chuckling, chortling, moaning, mewling, blanching, blushing, growling, grinning, and, of course, nipple hardening. It made the characters seem totally unstable — not just mercurial, but possessed by demons. No one should go from happy to sad to "mewling" within the space of a page! It's not right!

The End!

With the end of this review, I'm officially done with A Promise of Fire. I'll never have to think about this book again, although something tells me it will be haunting my dreams. I haven't hated a book with this fervor in a really long time.

The Witch Hunter » Book Review

Disappointed doesn't even begin to cover my range of emotions upon completion of The Witch Hunter. I wanted to love it! I was completely ready to jump on the bandwagon. But I sadly could only wave as the bandwagon passed me by along its journey to the squealing fandom.

Elizabeth - Our Witch Hunter

The setting of the book isn't anything new, surprising or special. Our main character is Elizabeth and she happens to be a witch hunter. She is pretty damn good at her job but unfortunately gets accused of witchcraft herself. Whoops.

Luckily she gets rescued! Unfortunately it's by a wizard. That isn't going to do her reputation any good.

I really enjoyed the first 100 or so pages of the book. But I quickly started losing interest after that. I can't exactly explain why. Maybe it's because I had left my hotel in Ohio and I could no longer read by the pool. Maybe the first 100 pages were only made interesting by the fact that I had THIS to look at (via bookishpeach @ Instagram).


I genuinely liked Elizabeth. She was strong, hard-working, and loyal. However, most of the characters surrounding her seemed dull and lifeless. Call me crazy, but it got to the point where I felt that book was seeping energy OUT of me.

Romance

We do have a teensy love triangle in the works. It didn't bother me too much because the two love interests were kept separate from each other and there wasn't a whole lot of mooning on Elizabeth's part. Her first love interest is Caleb. He introduced her to Blackwell and the world of witch-hunting but can't seem to see Elizabeth as anything other than a sister or a dear friend. So we do have some pining to deal with. Luckily it wasn't overwhelming and I found it quite relatable (since I do occasionally find myself in the pining stage as well).

Then we have John, the healer. I liked him, he seemed nice and sweet. But I FELT nothing. I wanted a romance that I could really get behind, something I could root for. All I felt was a lot of 'meh'.

Our Crew & Villain

I'm lumping these two categories together because I have the same complaint.

(Just so you guys know, I recited the rest of the lines in my head)

Elizabeth ends up going on a quest with a John, George and some girl whose name I can't remember because of a prophecy. What a wonderful opportunity for me to fall in love with these characters!

Nope. NOTHING. I have NO feelings.

We instead end up at a really bizarre juvenile party that reminded me a terrible YA high school contemporary instead of a fantasy story with real stakes. The change in tone really threw me off and I couldn't make myself recover from that.

Onto our villain, Blackwell. He was SO BORING. Nothing about his character surprised me at all. Apparently, I had guessed the big reveal right after reading the synopsis (which I must say, must be some kind of record for me). He was just a standard villain. There was nothing interesting about him.

There wasn't anything interesting about anyone, really.

I do have the next book, The King Slayer, already checked out from the library. I will probably give it a go in a few days just so I can complete this duology. Maybe it will be a little better than The Witch Hunter.

I know some of my blogger friends out there really enjoyed this one. I'M SORRY GUYS! I really did try, I promise.

PS: There is NO political intrigue. Absolutely none. Don't fall for the Game of Thrones comparison!

The Forbidden Wish » Book Review

The Forbidden Wish is a beautifully written book filled with exactly the kind of magic I needed. I shall do my best to be coherent, but there might be more swooning and gushing than one might except from a romantic cynic such as myself.

Now, I will be the first one to say that I am tired of the fairy-tale retelling genre. But Khoury did an amazing job with this one. This is a fantastic stand-alone fantasy novel that is a retelling of the story of Aladdin. At this point, I can't even decide which version I love more.

Our Jinni

Our protagonist is Zahra, the jinni. Formerly known as Genie voiced by our beloved Robin Williams. There are some major differences between the two. For one, Zahra is a woman. For another, she possesses an entirely different kind of humor.

Aladdin stumbles across Zahra's lamp deep in a cave surrounded by a beautiful garden made entirely of gems. He manages to escape with the help of Zahra and forges an unlikely friendship beyond that of master and jinni.

I loved reading from Zahra's perspective. She is a flawed character, witty, manipulative, and sometimes painfully insightful. Her life experiences have warned her against love in a way that is entirely realistic and plausible. I've read/watched too many heroes refuse to show or have emotion out of pure stubbornness and selfishness instead of having a justifiable reason.

The story is told in first person and is addressed to Zahra's old friend Roshana, also referred to as Habiba. Roshana used to a previous master of Zahra's but they formed a deep and abiding love for each other that transformed their bond into that of sisterhood. When Zahra spoke of Roshana, it was as if Khoury had weaved a spell around my heart. I could feel that love and connection resonate within myself, and it was a very powerful moment for me.

Everyone Else

The princess of our story, Caspida, is freakin' badass. She is a warrior princess with her own band of warrior-maidens. How amazing is that?! I loved every single moment with her and her ladies. Khoury did an amazing job creating a vast array of strong female characters with their own strengths, weaknesses and personality. Every character was distinct from each other and had their own role to play within their insular society.

The interactions between Zahra and Caspida had me pumping my fist in delight. Two strong women coming together to discuss politics and the fate of the kingdom? SIGN ME UP.

The romance that slowly developed and simmers between Zahra and Aladdin was absolutely swoon-worthy. Their relationship is built on friendship and mutual trust. There were moments when I would skim over some of the political intrigue in the story to get to an Aladdin and Zahra section. Of course, I made sure I went back and re-read what I missed.

Magic and the Jinni

I found the descriptions Khoury used to describe Zahra's brand of magic to be breathtaking. I am typically not a visual imaginative reader. By that, I mean that I don't picture things in my head. But when I was reading about Zahra, I couldn't help but imagine the swirls of smoke that would erupt around her as she practiced a certain aspect of her magic and giggle over her ability to turn from a cat or a bumbling peacock to a tiger at a moment's notice. I know I keep saying the same things over and over again, but this book was just beautiful.

If you're interested in learning a little more about Zahra's background, Jessica Khoury has written a free short story (HERE) on Wattpad aptly titled The Jinni.

I couldn't recommend this book more. I strongly urge you to pick it up and give it a chance yourself.