Awake » Book Review

Preston's Awake was a god-awful nightmare to read. It was BAD. But I forced myself to keep going because this was a long-overdue Netgalley book. However, I DO have some good news to impart. At the completion of this review, I will only have one more backlog Netgalley to read and review and I will be all caught up!

Tropes, Tropes, Troppity-Tropes

I'm writing this at 5 in the morning. Have I slept? Umm, no not really. My holiday weekend has turned into a binge read all night, sleep all day thing. This might be my loopiest review yet.

So, where was I?

Ah! Tropes.

First and foremost, we have instalove. I HATE IT. I HATE IT SO MUCH. If I cared enough, I would flip open the book to the first chapter and be able to type out countless quotes for you guys to nauseate over. But I'm sleepy. And I never want to look, touch, or hold this book ever again. So every single one of you will just have to take my word for it.

The book is told in alternating perspectives by Scarlett and Noah. Scarlett is a normal 16 yr-old girl with the exception of one little thing. She can't remember anything before the age of 4.

Big fuckin' whoop. Do any of you guys remember being 4? Hell I can barely remember grade school. If it weren't for pictures and videos and childhood friends, I would swear to you that I showed up fully formed in my parents' house with a suitcase full of books.

Noah is some random guy that shows up at school and starts making googly-eyes at Scarlett. They date, and in two seconds flat, they're in love. I was just SO BORED. Remember a few posts ago (here), when I mentioned how I hated reading the POV of a teen male character because of their intense fascination with boobies and other gross boy things? I never thought there would come a day when I would say that Noah's perspective needed more of that. He didn't read like a teen boy at all. Hell, he didn't even read like a separate character. It might as well have been Scarlett dating herself.

More Stupid Shit

What pissed me off the most, is Scarlett's and Imogen's interactions. THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE BEST FRIENDS. But you would be forgiven for not thinking that since they only talk twice throughout the whole book and both times were snippy and about Noah. Bechdel Test Fail.

Imogen is also slut-shamed. NOT COOL.

Scarlett's friends only existed in the first 5% of the book, just to facilitate interactions between her and Noah. They completely disappear after their job is done. Oh, except halfway through the book, Noah goes on a family trip for the weekend. And Scarlett has a conversation with Noah about going to Imogen's for the weekend. She mentions feeling guilty for not spending enough time with her, and Noah gets to tell her that isn't true. IT IS TRUE YOU WEIRDO.

The Mystery

WHAT MYSTERY???

I figured out everything within the first chapter. But I swear, I tried to give this book an honest effort. I actually read 170 pages of it, before I decided that I just needed to skim-read the rest. I should have just put it down. It didn't deviate at all from my lackluster expectations.

I Give NO MORE Fucks

I just can't bear to spend another minute or another word on this drivel any longer. I have no idea how this even got published. It's not even worth the paper it's printed on. Poor trees.

Rat Queens, Vol. 1 » Graphic Novel Review

I have owned the first volume of Rat Queens for over a year now. I can't believe it took me this long to pick it up!

I ADORED it. It is dark, gory, and laugh-out-loud hilarious. The artwork is stunning, and I loved the diverse group of women that made up the squad of Rat Queens.

Our Rat Queens

Betty



Betty, our Hippy Smidgen Thief, was dueling it out with Dee for my favorite character. She had some of the funniest lines, and she never failed to make me laugh.

Dee



Dee, our Atheist Human Cleric, is my official favorite. She has badass healing powers, and her social skills speak to my soul. This panel is my absolute favorite. That is straight up me at a party. Also I have to admit, I do have a teensy girl crush on Dee. BUT WHO WOULDN'T, amirite?

Hannah



Hannah is our Rockabilly Elven Mage. And she is SO COOL. I mean, look at them tats.

Violet



Violet, our hipster dwarven fighter, is a kickass fighter. And according to this installment, she and Dee have the most interesting backstory by far.

These women are unapologetically themselves. They are bawdy, vulgar, arrogant and badass. They aren't wearing skintight spandex, their bodies look like the bodies of women. I shouldn't be this excited by something this simple, but you don't often see women represented in graphic novels/comics in a realistic manner.

The volume was quick-paced, it threw you into the action right away. While I usually enjoy that, it did take me a while to recognize the individual characters. I also didn't necessarily feel like all of the characters were developed equally. I had a harder time getting to know and remember both Hannah and Violet. Hopefully that will be rectified in the next installment!

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Are there any graphic novel series that you enjoy? Let us know in the comments below!

Saga: Volume Five » Review

In Saga: Volume Five, writer Brian K. Vaughan and artist Fiona Staples present us with five new chapters in their sprawling space-epic.  If you've been following the series, you know that Volume Four ended on a bit of a low note. Shit continues to blow around in Volume Five, but I'm pleased to say that I'm either getting tougher or the storyline has stabilized a tad.  Many readers love the no-holds-barred aspect of Saga, but my heart can only take so much.

Don't get me wrong... Volume Five sees several character deaths, as well as plenty of gore, violence, and obscenity.  The Saga we know and love is still kicking.

In these five chapters, we switch around amongst three different locales and casts.  Hazel, Alana, and Klara have been taken away by Dengo, a rogue robot, who's stolen IV's baby son.  IV and Marko have teamed up and are in hot pursuit, taking baby seal look-alike Ghüs and Alana's old drug dealer, Yuma, along for the ride.  Our third principal plotline involves Gwen, Sophie, The Brand, and Lying Cat, in their quest to acquire dragon jizz to save the comatose bounty hunter The Will.

While Brian K. Vaughan should get tons of credit for his concept and script, Fiona Staples continues to take the series to the next level with her artwork.  As every critic and their mother have noted, Staples conveys the subtlest emotions with minimal, sparing lines.  It's flat-out incredible. Her panel arrangement is cinematic.  Her pacing is spot-on, utilizing that reaction shot before the revelation.  Remember the monster with the huge, warty balls earlier in the series?  We have something similar in Volume Five. This is our warning before we turn the page...

[caption id="attachment_837" align="aligncenter" width="518"] It's that bad.[/caption]

As for the writing, it's sparse and efficient, comprised of that mixture of English, bastardized Esperanto, and profanity we're now familiar with.  The characterization does not suffer for the brevity of language, however.  Saga is populated with a distinct and varied cast.  In regards to the major characters,  Volume Five sees Vaughan shift his developmental efforts away from Alana, who was a big focus of Volume Four, and towards Marko.  Remember how Volume Two delved into Marko's violent impulses and the reasons behind his pacifist turn? Volume Five takes Marko on a u-turn to some... interesting... places.

The pacing is not unlike that of a roller coaster. Because each chapter is released separately in comic book stores, many weeks apart, each short segment has its own plot triangle — up, up, up, up, do000000wn, up, down.  In this collection of five chapter segments, that makes for a lot of up and down.  Consuming Saga causes reading whiplash.  It's a wild ride, but a highly thrilling one.